Traffic

"You have gotta be fucking kidding me." My hand was still propped at the top of the steering wheel. I couldn't help but give a good squeeze before looking over my arm, into the gun leveled at my eyes.

Just on the other side of the car door stood a tall and scrawny hispanic thug jabbing around his matt-black .22 through the open window. He looked just like a brown skeleton to me. I saw tattoos printed up and around both of his bony little arms. The wifebeater he was wearing flapped lazily with the breeze, easily two or three sizes too big for him.

The skeleton repeated himself, all in the same heavy sing-song accent: "Get the fuck outta the car, homey. I don't wanna hafta blow your fucking brains all over. Comprende, pendejo?" He shook the gun a little for emphasis. I couldn't help but notice his failing nerves at this point, magnified by the trembling barrel of his gun.

I had had enough. It was clear to me that this little ruffian wasn't going to go anywhere without some help. My car probably would have worked fine for him, but it and I already had a date and this little inconvenience was not welcome.

"Okay, okay." I calmly took my hand away from the steering wheel and placed it next to the other in my lap. "How about this: You want my car, right?" I paused, looking down the length of the gun leveled right at the bridge of my nose. "How about you fight me for it, mano y mano? We can handle this whole thing like uncivilized men, and if you beat me fairly I will be the first to put the keys in your hands."

"Are you crazy, man?! I will fucking smoke your chatty ass right here. Get the fuck outta my car!" Then he jabbed the gun into my cheek forcefully, the muzzle almost breaking skin. I winced and at the same time felt my patience slipping away one accent-laiden word at a time.

Finally I opened the door and climbed out, calmly continuing, "Of course if I beat you, the doctors won't know what to do with what I leave behind. You'll probably live though - probably." My scrawny aggressor shuffled back a few steps, still as springy as ever. His sweat-rimmed eyes looked me over and unsteadily he gestured for the keys with his free hand. "Give 'em to me."

Amateur. About the time he'd realized his mistake, my training urged me forward and I'd already slid one long step forward, all the ground I needed to make up. He started to bring the gun between us when my hand gripped the top of the gun and twisted it clockwise, locking his finger between the trigger guard and handle. I couldn't help the rude grin splitting my face as a stiff jerk later, his finger snapped like the twig it already looked like.

Anyone might've thought I'd broken the guy's spine and not his forefinger by the way he collapsed, howling to the cloud-guarded moon as if it somehow gave a damn.

"C'mon," I said, allowing my sinister intent to begin leaking through. "You want my car? Get up and fucking take it already." I let the gun's clip fall free, then tossed the piece toward a nearby store front. A moment later I tossed my keys. They landed just beneath the open car door.

Glassy-eyed, the mexican, still favoring his arm as if I'd broken the whole thing, screamed, "My boys are gonna fuck you up now! You're dead already, you hear me?! You're dead!"

Without saying a word I went over and picked the thug up by the short black tuft riding the crown of his head. He began struggle almost immediately, but the weighing a whole seventy-and-change pounds bit wasn't exactly working in his favor. By the time I'd dragged him over toward the back of my car, he'd finally grown the balls to punch me.

Smiling, I let go of his hair. "Good, that's the spirit." I brought my hands up slowly and made loose fists.

So Viriginal, So Little Time

Normally, the idea for this thing is for me to have a place to dump these creative literary moments I get. I may or may not take these any further than what they are originally.

Honestly, I don't have any idea what's going to happen. I'm open to the evolution of whatever may come from this little experiment, provided I have the time and maintain any sort of care.

Only time will tell I guess.